Friday, June 6, 2008

eating in my pantry

I'm hiding in my pantry eating egg salad and Triscuits for lunch today. Why, you ask, am I hiding in my pantry? Well, I answer, (1) because I fit, and (2) because if anyone sees me a war will start. See, I can't eat something that Bug isn't eating. And Bug wants to do anything these days that Pook does, and both Bug and Pook seem to copy either LK or BK next door. And LK doesn't want yogurt. Not making sense yet?

LK came over earlier. It was barely still morning but we'd only just gotten our sorry summer selves dressed. Soon, LK decided he was hungry. Of course, now they all were. I'd been trying to sell some bananas that would be headed to banana bread if not eaten soon, so I suggested those. LK: "No fanks" (gotta love those Southern manners!) Bug: "I do!" Soon, all the copy cats were eating bananas. LK wants another. Bug wants another. I let them share one. They peel it. Bug doesn't want it after all. I've already eaten one, so it sits on the counter. They go play. Briefly. It is close to noon anyway, so when they came in as a group, clearly having chosen a leader to speak on their behalf, and they asked me for crackers, I suggested lunch for all of them. I bought a h*u*g*e pack of yogurt at Costco at my last visit, hoping to not get back there for a while. No one has been eating yogurt ever since. I suggested yogurt. Bug: "No-ooo" (can you hear the whine and lack of Southern manners?) Pook: "Isn't there anything else?" LK: "I'll have yogurt." He choses blueberry yogurt. I ask if he likes blueberry (yes), if he wants the whole thing (yes) so he opens it and gets a spoon. The others now want yogurt. I dole them out. They want blueberry too, of course. LK: "What kind is this?" (It is still blueberry.) Everyone starts eating peacefully. Then, LK: "I don't like it." Bug: "Me neither." Pook: "I'm not really hungry." I give warnings that if they throw out their yogurts, I am not getting them a new lunch. I send LK home to annoy his own mom and I repeat this to my own. I hate throwing out food. They do not get to taste six things and only eat the seventh. You peel the banana, you eat it. You eat yogurt out of the tub, you finish it. (The banana on the counter was clearly still annoying me.) They vow that they aren't hungry. They won't want anything else until snack time. (I predict hungry boys in the afternoon.) I finally relent and let them go without what I consider to be lunch. I wait until they are occupied and then I check out the contents of the fridge for myself. Leftover egg salad I made Wednesday. Everyone liked it, but there is only one serving left. Do I dare eat it while they're still in the house? Yup. In the pantry. I am a hungry wimp.

1 comment:

  1. This is a hilarious post and totally hit home for me this week. Damn kids eating me out of house and home.